Alphonso’s Neighborhood

I think that the things we want to do should be things that we are doing.

We all have dreams about what we want to do and what we should be doing, but then there's also the reality element. No one sells everything that they have so that you can go on a tour of Europe or to go and live in another country to learn a new language, cos you're gonna need those things but this is where the rubber hits the road doesn't it. Many people want to do ministry but the idea of doing it full-time. Once we've sorted out what is practically necessary for us to survive, then there's the dilemma of doing what we think we ought to.

Is it really practical to leave work so that you can share the Gospel? If everyone was involved with full-time ministry work, then what will happen to the economy? Should everyone then just get involved in part-time ministry work and find ways to practically work out our faith?

This is part of a discussion that some friends and I are having and so I'm being rhetorical when I'm asking those questions.

But it does make me think that there must be a happy medium for all Christians. At college I learnt that everyone ought to be learning theology and that everyone ought to be a market place minister. Maybe I need to do my HDE and start teaching at a high school and then I can be with the people who I feel called to work with anyway! Maybe my bucket list should include making a difference in the same people's lives for an extended period of time in the same place.

Maybe when Christians can exercise their calling in practical part-time ministries, then we can live out what God intended for us. Then we'd be doing the thing that we enjoy AND allowing God to use us for his glory.

I'm rambling a bit, but in writing that first line about doing what we should be doing, I had a rush of blood to the brain and all this just came out. The more I think on it, the more I like what is here. Maybe the item of priority for my bucket list should be getting my HDE part-time next year, so that I can get to a school in 2010 :)

What I'm really saying to you is that I think we should work out what is practical and what we CAN do and then instead of waiting for later or until you only have six months left, that you get busy with those things. If God came today, you won't be expected to answer for the things you wanted to do, but only on the things that you did.

So get started on the things that matter to God and don't let the "practical" things stop you from being salt and light where you are!!

In our small group last night we watched the DVD "How great is our God" from the Passion group with Louie Giglio.  The thing that stuck with me was this little molecule called laminin that in essence hold us together - check out this picture of laminin.

How amazing to think that at the very core of who I am is a cross!  Yes this does mean very different things to different people but to me it made me think that even though I want to have nothing to do with God and shove him to one side He is there at the core of my being.  He holds me together - OK it's the laminin that does this but you know what I mean.  The past two years have been a very painful road for me to walk and often it has felt that I have left God behind.  BUT I have not because He has been right there with me even though I may not have been aware of him.  Watching the DVD last night was a gentle reminder of being held by God and of God being with me in these very dark two years.

As I look forward and contemplate the arrival of my son I am so comforted to know that already God is right there with him.  In his little body his laminin is there and at the centre of that is the cross.  The cross that is life giving; the cross that is the hope of all who trust in Him; the cross that is the ultimate symbol of God's amazing love for all of us.  I really feel that I can say without a shadow of a doubt - HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD.

As I write this I am about to embark on the exciting (rather terrifying) journey that is motherhood in about 12 weeks time!  Just writing that number is increasing my anxiety levels...  As I think about preparing to become a mother I am so aware that it is so much than deciding on what colour to paint the room; buying all the stuff you need (which I have done none of yet - can you believe that!); etc; etc...  It's about getting to grips with the fact that you will be a parent to another human being - another live person who will enter this world and who you have responsibilities towards.  Man that thought blows my mind.....  I see why we have nine months to prepare for becoming mothers (and fathers!)!  Anything less would not do justice to the emotional and psychological preparation that one needs to undergo as parents.

As I watched the news last night with Alphonso I was struck by how very angry the world we live in is.  Is this the kind of world I want to raise a child in?  What is the solution to the anger?  What can we do to help those who are angry?  Having sat with a client who was struggling with anger I can see how anger poisons the soul and creates barriers between people.  A truly sad situation to be part of - and we are all part of this angry world.  And so as I contemplate becoming a mother I wonder what I can do to show my son both sides of anger and to help him learn to deal with his own anger and the anger that will undoubtly come his way.   And for me - what do I do with my anger....  I am left thinking about a rather corny quote that gets bandied about in anger management workshops - (hopefully I can get this right) anger can cook the carrot and it can also start a veld fire (apologies to those who actually know the exact quote - this is what I remember!).  How can anger be used constructively?

Dis speaks to me, because when I get separated from God, eating and drinking (pleasure) becomes what my life is about.  I say I am about God’s kingdom, but my life really is about me.  I’m still selfish and wanting to have my own way like a spoilt child.

The other day I was listening to sonicflood and one of the songs was saying: . . .

“My heart reformed, my mind transformed and my will conformed to yours.” (Or something like that) and I realised that I still have a way to go.

My heart still has a way to go.  My mind is slightly transformed, but when I consider my will and the fact that my mind isn’t completely transformed then how can my will be conformed to that of Christ.  I have the Spirit within me, but so much of who I am is still controlled by my old nature.

There’s a part of me that understands why people became monks.  It was easier to live for God when no pleasure was an option.  As long as the daily grind is centred on God and pleasure is completely removed then focus on God and being Godly would be easier.  Is it possible to live such a life today?  Is life to be devoid of pleasure?  Is their a form of pleasure that is pleasing to God?  Answer!?

If we do anything against our beliefs it is SIN.  This is why we need to know what God considers sin also, because we’ll excuse our habits/pleasures as ok and not consider it sin.  It’s amazing how we will justify even those things that we consider sin as not too bad so that we can get away with it.